A thought about staying at home…..
2009
Well, I was thinking while I was getting ready this morning…..well really it was noon already! ha!! I have actually been a stay at home mom for the last year. I quit my job just before Thanksgiving in 2007. I really didn’t have any idea of what it would mean being home. My darling husband bought me several books about becoming a stay at home mom prior to my departure from work and it was interesting to me that women felt their identities were gone with their job etc.
I was happy to read about a lot of the worries and how some of the gals prepared but in my heart I didn’t feel those same worries. Perhaps just the reading helped me to prepare making the transition more seemless. I just know that with the birth of each of my children all I wanted to do was be at home with them. With my first two, who are now 20 and 14, my now ex-husband wouldn’t consider me being home and leaving my “good” job! I had developed a strong resentment toward the women’s movement and the changing of society that made it nearly impossible to have a one income family.
When my husband and I started looking at the possibility it seemed a little surreal as it was something I wanted for sooooooo long! I feel so blessed to have this opportunity and my hubby has been so supportive all along the way, really…..yes, he does have some expectations of me since I have been home but we have worked through them I think?!?! I do have to remind him (just occasionally…..) that everything being done around the house takes time….and I am not “super maid, mom, wife, woman”.
I know in the last year I haven’t done everything right or taken advantage of all the opportunities to “do” things, I spent my time just trying to figure out what things to get involved in, what I wanted to spend my time doing etc. It has been so wonderful to just be with my little one, every nose wiping and bottom wiping and “mommy!! can you do this for me?” moment I wouldn’t change for the world. It has made me realize how much I missed taking my older two to day care and that brings a tear to my eye even as I type.
So, all that being said, I encourage any of you out there to do it if it’s your hearts desire to be at home……you won’t regret it!
Just do it!!!
Grace
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I also feel very blessed to be able to stay home with my kids. But there are days where I wonder why on earth I wanted to stay home….I have to say this is by far the hardest, most challenging “job” I’ve ever had. With that said, though, I wouldn’t change a thing….I never want to look back on this time in my children’s lives and wish I had been more present.
This was a wonderful post!
I am a stay at home mom with an 18 year old freshman in college and a 16 year old high school sophmore – both girls. I have primarily been at home since my first daughter was born – either at home completely or working very minimally. From 2007 to 2009, I went back to work full-time – as wonderful as the cushion of that paycheck was, I felt overwhelmed, distracted and too tired to take care of my home and family in the way I was used to. I felt like I was continually running to catch up and could enjoy very little of my life. The summers were the toughest – when the girls would be home all day by themselves and I was at work. I wanted to take them places and enjoy some relaxed time together (before the oldest was off to college). Another concern was that my oldest had a boyfriend at the time and I was concerned that she would bring him into the house when a parent was not there (which was, of course, all day M-F 8-5:30). The teen years are SUCH A CRITICAL TIME. Our kids are making decisions about who they are and whether or not to try drugs/alcohol, get involved sexually (and a healthy number do), etc. They are learning to drive (and all the worries and concerns that they will do it safely) and trying to figure out who their real friends are (fitting in becomes so key). This is on top of the tremendous pressure to perform academically, find something their “good” at – like band, a sport, speech, drama, etc, and get into college. Keeping open communication going with your teen is so critical. Being a parent of a teen is a big, big job. They are growing up and trying to figure out so many things. I am happy to be back home again. I know I’ll blink my eyes, and my youngest will be a high school graduate and on her way to college. It is really just a precious few year and then they are young adults with their oun lives.